In an attempt to promote “safe sex” on college campuses, university health centers and participating student groups are hosting outrageous events that serve no educational purpose. Their latest idea… condom fashion shows???
Yes, Montana State University-Bozeman is hosting their 5th annual Latex and Lace Condom Fashion Show set for February, 7.
What you may ask is a condom fashion show? The description for the 2011 show says, “The event showcases student creativity by displaying unique condom outfits designed and modeled by MSU students.” So, students will be parading around in costumes made from condoms. (I’m sure department stores are lining up to sell these babies.)
If you think about it, condoms would make a pretty nifty rain coat. Unless they’re Planned Parenthood condoms, then they’ll probably just break.
However, the event is about much more than just designing costumes out of mixed media. To the organizers “The goal of the event is to promote the use of condoms as part of a positive, healthy sexuality and to encourage communication about condoms and their use.” (Maybe someone should tell them that’s not the correct way to wear a condom.) And it has proven immensely popular: “Last year we were able to showcase 35 outfits to 1300 students and campus community members.” Go to the Facebook Event to see more outfits from the 2013 show.
So what does this “positive, healthy sexuality” and “communication” look like? (Besides wearing condoms on your head.) The MSU Student paper, The Exponent, wrote up the details of last year’s event in an article called “Condom couture: rubber meets the runway.” The writer of the article Matthew Schwager gives a first had report on the competition:
“… the award ultimately went to a group identified as “The Heavy Petting Zoo,” whose members included a “Cum-melon” and a “Spread-Eagle.” During an intermission, a vibrant yellow latex-covered podium was hefted onstage by two suited and sunglassed men. From behind the podium, the MSU Exponent’s mascot, Biff the Bobcat, who is also a puppet, announced his candidacy for the upcoming campus student senate elections, promising to “lubricate the financial aid process” and provide a “climax” for each student’s college career.” Schwager finishes up the article by noting that “…Missy O’Malley put it most concisely when students rose from their seats after the show. As attendees trickled out of the ballrooms, she exhorted over the P.A. system: “Cover your stump before you hump!”
Interestingly, Schwager didn’t mention that the event educated students on the high failure rate of condoms or the fact that they don’t protect you from STDS. Farewell to institutions of higher learning providing real information for students to make informed decisions.
And who is paying for this event? According to the email, the MSU Women’s Center, the Voice Center, AID Outreach and Bridger Care, MSU Health Promotion are hosting the event, which means that the taxpayers are funding these students to run around in costumes made of condoms! Now, that’s government spending at its finest!
The craziest part: this isn’t the first time this has happened on campus. It’s the fifth.